Backside

23 Jan

Getting a head start on swimsuit season. By popular demand… another song….. Click on the audio (underlined) here ->

Backside – Ivy Eisenberg

BACKSIDE

 (to the tune of “Landslide”)

Put on these jeans I finally found
The front looked awesome, then I turned around
And I saw my reflection in the three way mirror
Well my backside looked too round

Oh, mirror on the wall
What is fat
Can the woman within my heart rise above that
Can I sail through the changes of midlife lumps
Can I handle the reasons for my spreading rump
Uh oh

Well I’ve been afraid of leggings but I hear they’re back in style
But time makes you chunky
It’s hard to look funky
I’ll be round for awhile

[instrumental]

Well I’ve been afraid of thong-style panties
Dimpled as I am
I’m built like a sumo
My ass fills the room, o
Like two Virginia hams

So, I’ll buy some sweats in slimming brown
I’ll jog 10 miles to lose a pound
And if I see my reflection in the three way mirror
Will my backside still look round

And  now I see my reflection in the three way mirror
Yes my backside still looks round
Yes my backside still looks round

8 Responses to “Backside”

  1. janice January 23, 2012 at 1:00 pm #

    If I roll on the floor will it really help me laugh my ass off?
    Hysterical, Ivy, esp the verse on thongs.

  2. Sharon January 23, 2012 at 2:03 pm #

    Wonderful. You’ve caught the essence of the middle-age blues. Why do designers tend to think we’re all runway models?

  3. Cathleen Barnhart January 23, 2012 at 2:55 pm #

    I think you have a new reality show in the making here – Glee meets Biggest Loser.

    Great song!

  4. Ilene January 23, 2012 at 6:11 pm #

    Love this!!! OMG!

  5. Jody Worsham January 24, 2012 at 4:30 am #

    I just opp for circus mirrors that make you look skinny.

  6. Gabi Coatsworth January 26, 2012 at 6:20 pm #

    I LOVE the soulful sound you have there! My son has volunteered to do the video for you, so you can pout it on You tube…

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